There was a funny scene where all the ex-Companions were hooked up together in the TARDIS, and this sprung to mind:
This season on Real World: TARDIS
Tensions mount in the Real World TARDIS when the former relationship between Rose and the Doctor turns sharp when Rose can't decide between the Doctor and Human!Doctor.
(scene: Rose on phone to Jackie, who is in another part of the TARDIS)
Rose: Well, the Doctor -- the human one, I mean -- well, he's just like my Doctor. You know, the old one.
Jackie: Uh-huh. Say, what part of the TARDIS are you in? You've got bloody good reception there.
Sarah Jane is named House Mother (not merely because she's the oldest woman on board) with the understanding of Jackie's complete lack of maternal instincts to everyone Not Rose, and spends the first few weeks being extremely pissed off and yelling at everyone.
(scene: Sarah Jane lifts a pair of dirty underpants off of the console)
SJ: Whose IS THIS?
SJ: JACK I AM NOT YOUR MOTHER!!
Jack (off screen): I hope not!
Jack attempts to sleep with everyone, much to the irritation of his boyfriend at home, Ianto.
Mickie attempts to sleep with only Martha, who uses him as a last-minute rebound after being rejected, once again, by not only the Doctor but the Human!Doctor as well. Mickie's ok with this.
(scene: Martha sees both Doctors hovering over Rose, and hmphs, marching out of the room angrily. She snaps her fingers at Mickie as she passes him, and he rises to his feet with a grin and a wink at the camera.)
Donna introduces the collective Companions to various rooms in the TARDIS that she thinks they'll like. And predictably, Doctor-style, gets it hideously wrong.
(scene: Furious pounding on the door as Donna passes, it slides open so we can see Martha's hand waving frantically, only to be yanked back inside by a purple tentacle.)
Donna: Funny, I thought Jack was in that room.
Meanwhile, suspicious bald patches have began to form on the Doctor's head, and by the end of the week he calls a House Council.
WHO WILL BE ASKED TO LEAVE REAL WORLD: TARDIS???